Friday, December 14, 2012

Sometimes Bald Isn't Beautiful

Vindi here with another online dating horror story. 

I met this guy online from a dating site and I thought that I would give it a try.  I think I was 21 at the time if I remember correctly.  He asked me if I wanted to meet up at a bar and I was kind of excited because I hadn't been to too many bars yet.  He was about ten years older than I was, but I had always dated older guys, so that didn't bother me at all.  He sent me his picture and he said that it was a little bit old.  It had been cropped a little bit strangely with the top of the head cut off, but he was pretty cute and we seemed to have decent chemistry on the phone.  I thought I was going to have a nice time.  I was wrong.

We met at the bar and he was about fifteen minutes late.  He didn't apologize and he was kind of a douche and said something about, "Well, when your job is as important as mine is, you tend to run late for social affairs."  I think the best part was that he had purposely cropped his picture to cut off the top of his head, because he was totally going bald and rocking a comb-over that just wouldn't quit.  So there was that awkward moment.  He told me that I looked way better in person and I had no idea what the hell to say in return except mutter the obvious lie of, "Uh, yeah, you too..."

He ordered us drinks and then "forgot his wallet" and after he had finished his drink he was pretty tipsy.  I'm a lightweight, but this guy was just ridiculous!  He had one more drink and then the bar started getting kind of crowded, so we went to go sit in his car which he kept bragging about all night because it had an all leather interior and heated seats.  Ooooh! 

So, we sat in his car and listened to the radio.  He tried touching my leg but I just kinda kept batting it away and ended up putting my giant purse in my lap so that he couldn't try anything.  (Always carry a giant purse on blind dates, ladies!  You can use it as a weapon and as a cock-block if things go wrong! Haha!)  After I pushed his leg away for the third time he just kind of laid back in the seat and sighed and said "Ugh, it's okay.  It doesn't work most of the time anyway."  The hell?  I was hoping I heard him wrong but he just looked at the ceiling and said that "lately it hadn't been working."  I don't know if he was just that drunk or if he was trying to make me feel so sorry for him that I'd say something like, "Wow, I'm so sorry.  But I like a challenge!  I bet I could make it work!" 

Needless to say after that I wished him luck and went to my car.  It was a bad time and thankfully he didn't call after that :)

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